So I promised an update and here it is...
Yesterday my ex, My monkey eldest and I all jumped into the car and off we went to the Red Cross Children's Psychiatric Center, we left over 2 hours later and I have to say feeling rather despondent and a bit frustrated.
When we were phoned for the appointment I thought we would be seeing a doctor strait away but unfortunately that is not how the procedure goes and we first had to see the counselor and relay all of our information and why we were there to her, I have a lever arch file full that covers all of Loghan's appointments and steps we have taken since he was first diagnosed in 2011 so you can only imagine, to top it off the lady we saw did not seem to have very much patience for children especially ones that do not sit still etc... seriously; she also seemed to be very judgemental over the current decisions we have made with regards to splitting the boys up in order to give Gabriel more of the attention he needs so he doesn't end up getting to a point where Loghan is, so far this has affected Gabriel's behavior and personality for the better he is doing so much better at school and after care, it is not a decision that was made lightly or without thought and just because Loghan then says he misses his brother does not mean we made the wrong decision, case in point when they are together on the weekends, Loghan goes strait back to hurting and fighting constantly with Gabriel demanding every minute of our time and not allowing Gabriel even a minute of attention....
Our decision was made based on the need for all of the boys to get the attention and love the need and deserve it may not be a permanent decision and they are still together on the weekends but it was done based on what we were advised and felt as parents, teachers family etc.
I cannot begin to explain how mentally and physically exhausting having a child with special needs is, I am not complaining I would not change it for the world but when you have two and the one demands constant attention while the other has a personality whereby they feel like they are intruding by asking for attention it can be incredibly difficult and we needed to make decisions based on what was best for both of them, Gabriel may not ask for the attention conventionally but he had taken to baby like behavior and tantrum throwing, he was starting to get into a lot of trouble especially at aftercare, since we have split them during the week, the tantrums have all but abated and he no longer acts like a baby at all to gain attention so whilst I understand and know Loghan misses his brother in his own way we as parents needed to do this, it hurt and it was not something we wanted to do but in the end it really has helped.
Anyway back to the appointment, 2 hours later the lady decided we had been there long enough and advised I would need to return to give her all Loghan's medical history and then Loghan would need to return a while later to be interviewed and only then does she get together with the doctors and they make a decision from there as to what treatment he will need...
I understand it is government and our only option but it was a bit disappointing, the more time goes on without help the more chance there is of something else happening and it is incredibly nerve wrecking for us as a family, Loghan does not seem to understand the impact or what his actions have caused as much as we explain it to him, he blocks his ears and does not want to hear or talk bout anything, which is typical child behavior and when a child feels guilty or doesn't want to hear what you have to say... you get the picture.
I'm trying to be positive, personally I am not sleeping very well, my appetite has gone out the window, I know I need to see someone at the moment it's just not possible financially so I am going to be looking into a herbal medication to see if that may help, it's a long journey made even longer when you start to question your decision and choices over the years whether you should have done this or seen this doctor or that but the truth is we have seen the best doctors in the field and this is our last option, I do trust that in the end we will egt the help that we need I have been told red cross has some of the best doctors for children in the country so we just have to keep positive and keep pushing forward until we get the help we need.
School starts next week and Loghan gets a new teacher as his has relocated to the UK we were advised of this at the beginning of the school year, it is a shame because his teacher was just amazing and he loved her so much but we have been assured the new teacher is very much like her so Im sure it will be ok.
Hubby is back and we are finally settling back into routine at home, I cannot explain how great it is to have him home.
Jesse is just Jesse lol, he has recovered from chicken pox but has been left with quite a number of marks which we are hoping will fade with the help of tissue oil but otherwise he was very happy to have his daddy home again.
That's it for update on my front, I hope everyone has a wonderful cozy winterlike Wednesday =)
