So it's been a while... a long while but I have delayed posting on here because quite frankly I just didn't want to jinx the direction of our journey at this point but also because I felt like and still feel like I am going to wake up tomorrow and everything is going to be some kind of dream, someones idea of a sick joke, but no matter how many times I pinch myself we are still here at this
good better place headed in the right direction so today I decided to lay words to paper and update everyone on what has been going on these past few months.
First off if anyone has read my blog and knows anything about our journey, you will know that it has been as long as it has been painful, filled with so much hurt, disappointment and trauma and yet through it all we hung on to hope, hope that one day we would find the answer and our missing piece, something that would make everything fall into place and just make sense.
You see Loghan has been diagnosed with many things over the years: ASD, ADHD, OCD, Anxiety and ODD which was the most recent, but through it all I have always felt that there was something not quite right and although psychology is filled with diagnostic testing and criteria that one must meet for a diagnosis mistakes can still be made and/or things can be missed even by even the most brilliant doctors.
Just to make things clear I am incredibly grateful for each and every professional; doctor, psychologist, psychiatrist, counselor etc that has helped us along our journey even if it was for but a brief period of time, each and every one has given us more insight, another piece of the missing part we have been searching for. We still attend sessions at Red Cross and we have the most amazing psychologist there, a gentleman who has listened and been willing to search and try everything he possibly can but as I said even the best professionals cannot always see the full picture especially when you have a child or person who chooses to be selective about what they share or are willing to speak about.
In our search for help we have gone done many roads and tried everything we possibly could no matter how new or unconventional, you name it and we have tried it or at the very least researched into it and looked at the option, now my ex and I are vastly different in so many ways but this year a suggestion was made by my ex to try to go in a different direction and approach to try once again to find that missing piece, and when I say that I could not be happier that we took the leap and did this it would be an understatement.
2 months back Loghan started attending appointments at another center, this help wasn't sought as a replacement for the care that we receive at Red Cross but rather to supplement support and to get a different point of view if there was any to be had and in case you haven't guessed it by now we did and we have and I just cannot believe that it took so long to get to this point.
So what does Loghan have or not have?
Well he is for sure an Aspie or on the Autism Spectrum but that was something I knew in my heart even before we received the original diagnosis from Red Cross but secondly he doesn't have ODD which is something I suspected to be true but we now know for sure, he didn't meet the full criteria even the doctors admitted as much and his reasoning behind his behaviors just didnt match up or makes sense with an ODD diagnosis.
Aside from what we suspected or already knew we have a new diagnosis that brings in the OCD, ADHD and anxiety; what we have is a diagnosis of PDA and that my friends is something magical because once we read the information surrounding PDA we were floored to say the least!
At last we found that missing piece or at least one of them, a diagnosis that fit our child and his symptoms or traits to the T, something that proved that he was not just a naughty brat who did not want to listen just because, a diagnosis that proved he has an anxiety driven need for control (commonly found in ASD children particularly those who have experienced trauma) that is both very real and cannot be helped or at least he cannot help it, all the trauma as well as how certain people have reacted to him and treated him over the years combined with the way that he has dealt with that trauma I promise you it is so incredibly easy to judge a child or persons behavior when you don't know the full story or don't bother to find out if I wrote book I am sure people would find it difficult to believe, when I say our life has been a literal shit show circus and that our entire family has been told we have PTSD from having to deal with it all I am not exaggerating!
So for a tad bit of insight...