Monday, 17 August 2015

What would I do....



Someone asked me last week, what I would do if my boys ever brought home a pregnant girlfriend and they were still in school/in their teens.

Now obviously I was a teen mom so it didn’t take much for me to have an answer….

Honestly I would be a bit disappointed because I would hope that my sons will have learnt from my life and me telling them of my life, parenting is not an easy road to take no matter your age or whether you are settled or married or not so being young and in school makes it far more difficult and you are forced to deal with issues and make decisions that at that age you really shouldn’t have to….

I think for a woman coming to terms with having a baby as a young mom can be much easier in the way that it is in us (well most of us) instinctively to nurture and care for our young where as men and teenagers can still be selfish and self-centered and may not have the same focus as the mom does…
However I would hope that I have instilled in my sons the right values and caring to know that if this did happen they could come to me and whilst I would be upset at first I would definitely do all I can  to help  both him and his partner, I would not raise their child for them as I believe that it is their child and they need to learn and take responsibility but I would help them emotionally, mentally and financially in every way that I could and I would try to do this without hindering or interfering as far as possible.

When I fell pregnant my parents were extremely angry but when they came round, my mom said that she would help me where she could but that this was my child to raise, she had her turn and that she would not allow me to pass on the responsibility of said child should I choose to keep him/ her which of course I did.
As far as my sons are concerned I would expect them to step up and take responsibility, I would also encourage and insist that both him and his partner finish school, thankfully I had already finished school and my ex did a year later, I did however drop out of college in my 3rd year of my studies and this is something I still regret.

If my son’s partners parents refused to help their daughter or support their daughters decision I would open my home to that girl, my exes mom did that for me and I am still grateful for that to this day, it could not have been easy for her and it definitely helped my situation to be away from my parents for a while.

So that is basically the b and end all of everything I love my children and I want the best for them, as I said before the journey of parenting is not an easy one so I would hope that my children would wait, speaking from personal experience, I have most enjoyed motherhood now that I am a bit older, but only time will tell what the future holds, I would never turn my children away, I don’t think it helps to get angry etc because what’s done is done and that is your child and grandchild….

Couldn't find a male orientated pic, but this is so true

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