Thursday, 8 January 2015

The rest doesnt matter....

I believe very strongly that how or in what manner a woman gives birth is her porrogative and choice bar of course putting yourself or your child at risk due to that choice.

I have found very sadly that woman are very much judged for their birthing choice particularly ceaser moms.

As a ceasar mom this should make me very angry and it does because as I have said many times before parenting in itself is a hard journey and one that it is difficult enough without the judgment of others.


There are pros and cons to both births and you as a mother need to make the decision of what is best for your child in the end your child will not know whether he/she came into the world via your vjj or your stomach they will only know that they are loved and in the end that is what matters.

I hate that these posts need to be written but clearly they need to be.

There is just so much hoity toityness that surrounds birth and it needs to stop.

I have seen friends go through every birth option imaginable- natural, ceaser, water birth, home birth, elctive, non elective and they all have one thing in common they all in the end hopefully result in a healthy baby and mom- all of them are beautiful and yet ugly and they all result in what should be the happiest moment of your life.

I will never understand why woman are made to feel or do feel that they have failed when they do not accomplish the birth they envisioned because at the end of the day you have your gorgeous baby to love and cherish what more could you want- my births were not pretty and not one ended the way I envisioned which was me spending 4 days in hospital with my gorgeous newborn just me and him bonding alone- they all ended up in NICU- I cried I got angry and sad the 2nd time it happened but I realised that it didnt matter because I got to take them home when there are so many woman who do not have that privledge so many woman who go into give birth and walk out alone or go in to have a healthy baby and end up with a baby who is not or even still those ladies who do not even get to reach the point of going in at all.

I have lost babies and I am ever so grateful for the 3 that have made it to my arms- their birth was not as I planned but thats ok because i would never love them any less because of it and vice versa.

If you have had a natural birth wow amazing you are in my oppinion a very strong woman to go through that but the same goes for a ceaser mom- it is not an easy decision and neither is taking the easy way out.

Just take a moment to think about how you would feel to be ridiculed for your birth choice say for instance when you are a ceasar mom and get told you were to posh to push, took the easy way out or put your baby at risk what if the wheels are turned and you as a natural mom are told you put your child at risk, or even risked your child's live for leaving your baby to 40 weeks or more or risked strangling your child with their cord because that is often missed on a sonar.

If you are adamently pro natural and believe that ceasers are wrong did you breast feed if not then how dare you judge others for not doing what we are naturally made to do vice versa if you are a ceaser mom and adamantly believe natural birth is wrong which I found to be way less common than the other way round then why do you breastfeed when technology made formula.

Please ladies at the end of the day we are all woman- we are all first time moms at some stage and we all need to rely on eachother for love and support not judgement and hate.

You are no better than the mom next to you for your choices as long as they are made with love and with your childs best interests at heart if you feel that the best choice is natural birth great then you should be able to at least try to give natural birth and the same goes for ceasers.

Someone mentioned earlier that medical aids will no longer be paying for elective ceasars as they are pro natural that is not true they are not pro natural they simply do not want to pay for a more expensive birthing option unless they have to which is wrong.

At the end of the day ladies you are all amazing because you have all accomplished something no man can we have all made life and given birth to it we have held our precious babies in our arms loved them cuddled them and sang to them sweetly- we have whispered I love you when we think no one can hear and we have all cried tears when they start to show signs of growing up.

I am a mother and so are you the rest doesn't matter.....

Dont these 2 woman look equally in love

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