blended families, tecnicalities...

 

I have three sons and technically my 3^rd son is half- brother to his older brothers as their fathers are different, my ex and his wife are also expecting a boy in June, which means another half -brother will soon be here. (yes all boys our fridges will always be empty =) )

I really hate using the terms half -brother, step brother, step father or adopted sibling, they are technically true, but I will never use these terms directly with my boys, they are all brothers I don’t see why it should matter that their fathers or in the new arrivals case their mother is different and I don’t see why my kids should see it any differently.

In essence and at the end of the day we are one blended and extended family, we are linked to each other permanently through my two oldest boys and as much as we have times of disagreement or do not always get along we are family and families do not always have to get along or even like each other all the time.

The boys are excited for their new brother arrival and I know they are going to be great with him, family isn’t always about blood, you do not have to have the same parents, mother or father, it is about being there for one another and making memories together of which I am sure there are plenty to come.

 

Why I still have my first wedding album

When people break up or divorce it is instinctual or part of the process for most people to throw away or destroy any remnants or reminders of their failed relationship, understandable of course it is not in our nature to or in most people’s nature to keep things that remind them of a failure or pain.

So it comes as a surprise to many people when I tell them that I chose to keep my first wedding album, most people cannot understand why so I will explain.

I kept it because even though our relationship failed I did love my ex and our wedding day was a big day in our relationship, I kept it so that one day I could give it to the boys so they can see that their father and I did try, that we did love each other at one point and that they were made with love and that album is proof thereof, Loghan was also at our wedding and some of those photos are very precious to me, the ones where I danced with my dad as well are very precious and full of emotion.

For me the album also represents a time in my life where I was establishing myself as a mother, when I first left home properly and lived in my own place and not with family I was 20 years old and I think for all the things that we faced we did pull through a lot, my ex finished school despite what statistics said, I attended college and worked, I had and was raising a gorgeous son this is what I choose to remember and appreciate when I come across that album and it is why I will not toss or destroy it.

It may be unconventional, I still have pictures and things from that period in my life, they represent a very significant time in my life and I don’t see why I need to throw them away just because my ex and I are no longer together, maybe my children will want to know about that time, maybe my children will ask if there was ever a time when we were happy etc, I can pass these things onto them and show them that there was and were and that were and are very much loved and were made with every intention of that love.

My dad and I- I cried like a baby

Loghan was just too gorgeous for words