Wednesday, 20 September 2017

Hard Lessons Learned

These past two weeks have been harrowing and I am by no means exaggerating, I have been mentally physically and emotionally sickened by the events of the past 2 weeks and to be honest I lost my faith in humanity for a brief period there. 

I firmly believe that every single person that comes into your life is brought into your life for a reason, good or bad, to learn a lesson or to teach one; every single person is important but I’m not going to lie and say that I did not question this internal message this past week.

To be brief someone came into my work place as a colleague, she came with a somewhat checkered past and issues but we are a family and we know that everyone has issues in some way or another so we opened our doors, our hearts and in some people’s cases our pockets… she has kids and what can I say it’s a soft spot.

Only to find out that not only has this woman cleaned out half of her land ladies home, a home that I organised to help her out, she has stolen from our work and fallen into old ways ie drugs all whilst breastfeeding her toddler.

Guys I cannot even begin to explain the anger, the sadness, it grates me to the very core; EVERYONE went out of their way to help this woman and all they got for it was a kick in the face, but you know what, I can still handle that we are all adults and we make our decisions, call me names to all your drug buddies, spread lies about everyone who tried to help you, that irks me but really doesn’t bother me in a way that I can’t move past, but to put an innocent child in harm’s way that is something that I just won’t stand for.

I was so incredibly angry, I still am, I have never in my life witnessed so many lies, so much betrayal it sickens me, physically it made me ill.

It was an incredibly difficult lesson to learn, after having helped people in the past and being burned I know not to get to invested in people, it sounds terrible but it’s a sad truth, I ignored so many red flags and let my heart run away with me because I wanted so badly to believe that this person could change and honestly at many points it did seem that she was trying but it was all a lie.

But you know what I have learned at the end of the day time and time again, the wheel turns, you may think you’re smart hunny but at the end of the day what are you left with… NOTHING, you have lost your kids, your home, your job and all you have left are addicts who would sooner throw you under the bus than ever lift a finger to help you out of the mess you have created for yourself… was it worth it?

So good luck is all I can say, we will move on, but you my dear will pay for your decisions for the rest of your life, I can only hope that no one else has the unfortunacy of you ruining their lives or attempting to and that your children are kept FAR away from you, because you are no mother, no woman who swears on her child’s life that she is not on drugs and doesn’t steal even when confronted with proof ie an almost empty packet of meth falling from her own pocket (gee how did that get there apparently she didn’t know), photos of her with the stolen goods, proof that she sold the goods to various pawn stores… I could go on, deserves that title, your children are beautiful and they deserve better, this is honestly something that I never thought I would say to someone but it’s true.

This lesson was a hard one, but one well learned none the less.

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