Tuesday, 22 November 2016

A small confession and kids at odds

I’m going to let you in on a little secret, it’s not something I have ever admittedly said aloud, but sometimes I envy moms with single children… shock and horror… let me explain.

I adore my kids and having 3 for me has been a perfect number I wouldn’t have it any other way!

However I do envy that with a singular child you only have one personality to contend with, whereas in my situation I have 3 and believe when I say they are all 3 so vastly different it’s like dealing with a split personality.

Loghan is so loving and so kind but hellava bossy when it comes to his younger brothers and because of his disorder loves to show his brothers how they are playing with something incorrectly or doing something incorrectly or that they have pronounced a word incorrectly… you get the picture.

So this puts him at odds with most adults because he loves to assume he is an adult trapped in a child’s body as well as children who do not appreciate being told what or how to do things.  Loghan has great social difficulties and struggles to make friends and this puts him at odds with Gabriel in particular.

You see Gabriel has too many friends to count, he is very easy going and has a very vivid imagination and tends to get along with everyone, this bothers Loghan and leads to much jealousy and argument in our household.

Gabriel on the other hand has odds with Jesse, Jesse is in between the other two, socially he has many friends, his teachers and other adults always gush over him and want to cuddle and play with him, he returns this affection with a coy and shy persona which makes everyone love him even more, but he is also quite firm in things being just so and getting his way and loves to tease Gabriel and get up to mischief which is just up Loghan’s alley so they are thick as thieves and have had a very close bond from the get go.

Their different personalities mean they often clash with each other and it also makes discipline incredibly difficult because what works for the one does not necessarily in fact often doesn’t work for the other, I can give Gabriel a smack on the hand and he will listen whereas Jesse will Laugh and Loghan will just have a meltdown, but take a privilege away from Loghan or send him to his room, it may be a huff and a puff to get there but his behaviour changes dramatically after that.

Their love languages are also different- Loghan likes gifts and tokens and requires constant assurance and affirmation and time as well, while Gabriel loves to be held and Jesse is a mix of personal affection and time, this also makes things difficult because when doing one activity the one will most likely complain as they do not feel the activity or time spent is enough or suitable for all.

Loghan requires constant attention and cannot play alone while Gabriel is the opposite this will lead to Gabriel complaining that we do not spend the same amount of time and energy on him, which in some respects may be true but it is not on purpose… you see what I mean… you just cannot win =)

I will say it again, I love my kids and 3 is my perfect number it doesn’t make the journey easy =)

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