Monday, 19 October 2015

Iv'e fallen down but I will get back up!

So I have been fighting against doing this post for the last week but after reading another post on one of my favourite local blogs I have decided to do it….

Remember when I wrote that post about Breaking Things off with the Scale, I spoke about my new healthy path, one where I no longer cared to weigh myself because it’s not about the numbers on that scale it is about being a healthier me and being happy within myself…

Well I have put that post to shame….

Over the last few weeks I haven’t been feeling really well combined with us struggling financially it has led to me not eating so well and this all came to a head over the weekend whilst I was getting changed for the day, I looked myself up and down and remarked to my husband that I had gained weight.

He of course remarked that I was talking nonsense and being silly and that just snowballed to me scrutinizing every lump and bump in the mirror to prove that I was indeed right, still not satisfied this led to me jumping on the sale which I swore outright I would not do and after seeing those numbers go up albeit by 2kg, I felt terrible ugly and fat and disgusted with myself, defeating every aim I had struggled so hard to build up; feeling good about myself, loving my body for what it was, being healthy and happy, everything came crumbling down….and the scale and mirror won again.

Why??? What is it about that stupid piece of archaic electronics that can make you feel like an absolute pile of poop argh, I was so angry with myself, I looked at myself in the mirror defiantly and decided that again enough was enough I had fallen off the wagon and now I needed to pull myself back up and repair all the hard work I had taken minutes to destroy, it’s a never ending story for so many woman but it is a struggle I will overcome because I don’t deserve to be put down by the very person who should be my biggest advocate and supporter… myself.

The scale and mirror may have won this battle but they will not win the war!

Be your biggest supporter ladies!

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