I had a topic in mind for discussion today but I'm not sure whether I'm going to get there I am just so exhausted.
I love writing and this blog has really become a sanctuary for me and a platform to really get down and discuss topis that are close to my heart and I really enjoy it, it does take up a lot of my time and I always try to do something informative everyday, this takes time and proper research and today I'm just so bleh I don't want to push something out just for the sake of it.
It really does mean a lot to me to see on a daily basis the amount of people who take the time to read what I have written its really encouraging and uplifting for me as a person and I am so grateful for it.
Tensions are a bit crazy high in my household at the moment and I'm just having one of those weeks.
Jesse is not only sick with the flu but he is also teething and we have jumped right back to where we started which is him staying up for pretty much the whole night leaving hubby and I exhausted and when we are both tired we are seriously not the nicest people to be around, I know I tend to snap very easily as hard as I try so that is causing a bit of an edge in the household at the moment.
Also Gabriel's birthday coming up is a bit crazy, I am trying my best to give him a birthday that he will remember; lately he has developed a serious case of middle child syndrome.... and before everyone gets in an uproar it seriously does exist HOLY MOLY, I had an angel child who turned into a little monster over night, he screeches and squeals for everything, he compares everything he gets to what his brothers get, he is constantly whining and clingy, I understand it believe me I do, with Jesse being the baby and Loghan's condition getting a lot of attention all the time it is easy for Gabriel to get a bit lost in everything, I am trying so hard to make sure he knows how loved he is and to focus some one on one attention on him.... but for now that doesn't seem to be working and him and his brother are constantly screaming and fighting making the edge in the house just that much more sharper.
Lastly to top it off- Loghan has become extremely paranoid over the last while, this has happened before when he underwent a medication change so we are thinking it is probably his change over to the lower dose that is causing it.
He will not go to the bathroom on his own, he will not go up the stairs alone, every night especially with the wind howling I have to show him that each and every window is securely closed, all blinds and shutters are closed etc, whoosa... it has become extremely frustrating especially when I am on my own and for instance breastfeeding and he needs the loo etc, it has also rubbed off onto his brother so it is now coming from both sides.
Now I know that as a mom I need to just let the water run down my back, I need to grit my teeth and muster patience out of no where but being tired has made this so difficult sjoe I'm just tired and run down I guess.
My day is long it starts at 5am and ends at 10pm, Im going to give a little bit of a break down because I have had so many single people say ag come on how bad can it be:
5:15am- get up, get Jesse into our bed, clean his room get his clothes out, take them to my hubby to dress him.
5:30am- wake the boys, nag them to get up and dressed and to brush teeth and clean up
6:00am- clean up our room get dressed and ready, yes this takes me 10 minutes I have become super efficient!
6:10am- Take the boys and all the laundry down stairs, turn on the tv get them settled try get them to tell me what they want for breakfast
make coffee, make the boys breakfasts- they each want something different by the way and may change their minds 2 or 3 times in the process
put the washing on, do the dishes clean up the downstairs area
Feed the animals- the rats and cat
6:30am- express for daycare and finish Jesse's bag
Do final dishes and check everyone is sorted and house is clean
6:50am- we are out the door, boys take forever fighting an arguing over seat belts and such
7:05am- kids are dropped and leave for work
5:40pm- fetch boys from day care
5:50pm- walk threw the door, put the t.v on settle the boys
6:00pm- unpack and re-pack bags for school
6:30pm- hubby hopefully walks through the door and takes the kids up to shower, otherwise I need to do it and the things I would do while he is busy gets put on hold for when the kids are asleep.
I use this time to bring laundry in and take new laundry out and then put more laundry on, feed the animals again and finish supper
7:00pm- supper is ready, everyone eats, I then do dishes and clean up
7:30pm- kids go up to bed I read them a story
feed Jesse and get him down for a while
8:00pm- fold laundry, clean up, get all my stuff ready for the next day, check homework, read circulars, make coffee
9:30pm- I finally sit down have my coffee which is usually cold, take a bath etc and then usually Jess is up again
So I think its fair to say I have a pretty jam packed schedule for a working mom of 3, I have great respect for working moms as well as stay at home moms both sides have their ups and downs but there are definitely days when I wish I could just be home, I am grateful to have my job I really and but it does get a bit crazy.
In any case I think that's enough of my sob story for the day, if I feel less frazled later I will write that piece.
Have a great day