So I've been asked why I haven't been vlogging lately....
First up I would just like to say that no I have not given up on vlogging or lost interest in vlogging I know I originally said that I wanted to get a vlog out every week and now I haven't in quite a while...
My reasoning behind it is well really embarrassing and narcissistic so I was honestly hoping that no one would ask me and it would go unnoticed but it hasn't so here it goes.
The truth is that I really do not feel all that great about my appearance right now, not my body but my face... I've mentioned lately and in a previous vlog that my skin has really just gone crazy all of the sudden and it just seems to be getting worse to the point where my skin physically hurts, it hurts to smile it hurts to frown to the point where I now take off my make up on the way home in the car after work, I just want to cry my skin has never felt so awful and nothing I am doing seems to be helping.
Now I know many of you will tell me not to wear make up as it is probably making things worse... I know that but unfortunately I am in a position at work as the receptionist that I simply cannot work with clients with a bare face that looks so bad because it really does and I don't think I could face a client like that anyway so its a bit of a crappy situation...
I know its vain and seems silly especially since I always encourage the woman around me to be proud of their looks and not be afraid to bare it all natural in public but I am ashamed to say after going out in public bare faced last weekend and this that I felt embarrassed and ashamed, it honestly felt like everyone was looking at me with disgust and I just wanted to run home and cry... my skin cleared up so well after my surgery and I was feeling really good about myself and now I just feel down right ugly....
So there you have it my naked feelings I don't want to get in front of a camera bare faced and I know I will be hindering or hurting my skin even more if I do so I will not be vlogging for a while, I have promised to do a review vlog however in the coming month which I will do, and I have a haul and cloth diapering vlog I really want to do so I am really hoping that I can get over this to the point where I can film, If anyone has any ips or suggestions please feel free to comment or message me I really would appreciate it I know there are probably woman out there who have it so much worse but this is just how I feel right now....
As always thank you for reading.
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