Wednesday, 14 September 2016

Adult musings....

This is going to be a fairly waffle on adult orientated post so if that is not your cup of tea better leave this one out.

Yes I’m a mom guys but I am also an adult woman and I find that when it comes to this blog I tend to hold back a whole lot because I am a mom, when in real life, I swear and have really twisted friends and have a really twisted sense of humour, I swear I talk about sex etc etc… I often don’t bring this to my blog I know it’s not everyone’s cup of tea and it may offend people but anyhoo there are going to be times when I post about these things, if I offend anyone I am sorry but when I started this blog it wasn’t aimed at just motherhood it was aimed at everything in my life alongside with my mothering journey.

My introduction to sex in general in my teens was not romantic in anyway, I was a very naïve stupid teenager who just wanted to fit in and have a boyfriend bla bla bla so my introduction to sex was through a male friend all very blaise and no romance or feelings involved whatsoever and it really warped my approach and the way I saw sex and sexual relations, I came to see it as more of a means to an end and something that was just expected in a relationship, and my parents never approached the subject of sex at all with me so I really had no one to tell me hey this is not right, I became a very promiscuous teen and for what... a whole lot a bad memories for the most part.

It was really only when I started my relationship with my husband I learned that hey this is awesome and beautiful and about both partners enjoyment not just one sided, I also learned that whilst sex is not the b all and end all in a relationship it really is important for both partners to have a healthy sexual relationship.

Fast forward to having kids I know feel and know that it is very important to age appropriately talk about these things with your pr-teens and teen so that when and if they go into a relationship that turns sexual they do it safely and correctly that it is done on their terms they do not feel coxed or pressured into the situation and that they approach it as a serious and beautiful act between two consenting and ready partners, and yes I know many moms are screaming in their heads what the hell sex is for marriage and all that but I’m not naïve or stupid and most kids do not wait and I would rather my kids are safe and knowledgeable than go into it like I did, quite frankly I don’t believe in the whole sex is for marriage either I believe it can often raise unrealistic expectations and put a lot of pressure on a new couple but I know this opinion will not be shared by everyone, personally it’s really not up to me that is my kids decision one day all I can do as a parent is help them to prepare for it, by actually talking to them and being open with them so that hopefully they do not make the same mistakes.

It is scary and I know so many moms do not even want to think of that point in their kids’ lives but life is scary guys and we need to make sure our kids are prepared I know what it is like going in with nothing and it turned into so many heartaches, so many stupid mistakes and although my eldest was in no way a mistake a teen pregnancy and by then I was educated I knew about protection and safe sex my attitude towards everything was the issue.

Anyway if you have made it this far into the post, thank you for reading, if you have teens maybe you can share you take on this subject or maybe you have your own take based on personal experience, if so feel free to leave a comment.

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