There is a saying that has become somewhat of a mantra for me over the past few years and that is that it is ok to not always be ok.
These are the words I repeat to myself on the days on which I do not want to get out of bed and on the days I sit with silent tears behind my computer screen watching YouTube vids that portray sad stories or any sort of true life drama that brings tears to your eyes just because I feel the need to cry, they are the words I recite to myself in the mirror on the days I feel like hiding from those around me and on the days I do not feel much love for myself, on the days I feel like I am failing as a parent or a wife.
It is ok to not always be ok.
But… and there is always a but.
After I utter these words, I have come to realise that whilst it is ok to not be ok I give myself time, however much time I need, sometimes its 5 minutes or an hour sometimes it’s a day or a week, I give myself that time to not be ok and then I get up and move forward, my kids play a big part in this I feel that I need to give myself the time to not be ok to feel down but I feel that I owe it to them as their mom and to myself to get up after that time is done and somehow I always do even if at times I feel like I don’t want to or cant.
I have seen this with so many of my fellow moms and it makes being a mom even more special because somehow no matter how low we are feeling, no matter how much we have on our plate we get up again and sometimes today just needs to be enough for today, sometimes getting through the next 5 minutes hour or day needs to be good enough and we as mothers even if you do not suffer with depression or anxiety or other emotional or psychological disorders I think we need to realise that sometimes today just needs to be enough for us and those around us and that if you are feeling down or lost, if you want to hide away from the world for a time that is ok.
Sometimes it just has to be enough that there is food on the table even if its pb and J or two minute noodles.
Sometimes it just has to be enough that the kids are clean and have clean clothing today even when there is a pile of washing waiting.
Sometimes it just needs to be enough that the kids are happy and quiet even if that is in front of the tv set.
Sometimes it just needs to be enough… and that’s ok.